Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Saving the Drama (Or, 4th Graders, Dog Snatchers, and Mike Huckabee)

Sunday morning. Sunday school. My third, fourth and fifth grade girls are talking about the birthday party they attended the previous evening:

She does not like him!

Yuh-huh! Does to! She likes him but he never liked her. She likes Matthew but he likes...

Nuh-uh!

At the back of the class, a self-proclaimed "mature" fourth grader stands to her feet. "Y'all," she pleads. No one listens. "Y'all!!" she exclaims, louder. No one pays attention. "Y'ALLLLLL! YAAAAH-LLLLLLL" she yells, silencing the class. Everyone turns to look at her.

"Save the drama for Obama," she says, and sits down.

*******************

This morning. Early. Millie and I are in the front playing fetch. I go around the side of the house to get another tennis ball. (Millie nearly choked on a stick last week, so now I'm super paranoid.) I come around the corner to see no sign of Millie, and a four-door car with two suspicious-looking guys speeding away. No Millie. I look everywhere. I scream until my throat hurts. I run down my street, up another street, yelling. No Millie.

Five minutes later I'm at the police station. "Chief, somebody took my dog," I blubber. Officers come out from behind their desks. Two patrol officers get a description of the car. The man officer looks at the woman officer and something passes between them. She nods and leaves. Tracy, the man officer, says, "I think we may be able to get Millie back. We'll try."

"When you find them, could you please just shoot them?" I ask. He looks at me.

"Okay, then could I borrow your gun and shoot them myself?" I add, hopefully.

"Go home," he says. "We'll call you."

*******************

I didn't. I drove around with the window down, yelling. I passed Mrs. Carpenter, who, upon hearing of the situation, told me that's what I get for not keeping Millie inside. I told her if she ever sprays Round-Up on my blackberries again, I'll spray Round-Up on Prissy, her dog. I'm upset. I drive off. Great. Now I've threatened two people in half an hour. I explain to God that I'm terribly upset and promise not to shoot anyone or spray poison on any mean Old Lady Carpenter's dog if only I could get Millie back.

*******************

About thirty minutes later Millie is found. Unharmed. Alongside an apartment building two streets over. She acts as if nothing has happened and seems annoyed at my greeting. The police are thanked. As they drive off, I start pulling Millie in the direction of Freeman House. She doesn't want to go. "Come on, Millie," I say. Then, "Save your drama for Obama."

******************

This day already feels four days long, but I leave within the hour to go meet Mike Huckabee. I adore Mike Huckabee. He seems like the kind of guy you could tell all your lame little stories to - like how the girls in your Sunday School class say the most hilarious things and how your dog gets snatched and the police department goes on alert. He seems like the sort of guy who would nod and laugh. That's one of the things I like about him. Anyway, I have to leave early for this thing because Millie is staying with my sister since I refuse to leave the little dog anywhere unattended today.

We can't have any more drama. We are, after all, apparently saving it for someone else....

27 comments:

Patsy said...

Dear, wonderful Millie. So glad she wasn't hurt. I would have been frantic too.
Mike Huckabee is a good one. I voted for him in the primary. Hope you had a good time.

Susan said...

There's nothing more worrying then a dog on the lam. I gave my heart to an occasional winter fence jumper - if the snow drift was high enough, the theme from Bonanza would play softly in the background and off he'd go ... leaving me roaming the streets sick with worry. I "always", thankfully, found him again unhurt. SO happy Miss Millie's safe and sound.

Vee ~ A Haven for Vee said...

Oh, Brin, you've had me laughing so hard. I'm going to be able to carry on with a grin thanks to this post. "Save the drama for Obama" indeed!

I'm pretty jealous that you're going to meet Mike Huckabee. Hope he knows how many are out here rooting for him. Well, him or Sarah P or him and Sarah P or Sarah P and him. ;D

Sue said...

So glad all worked out with Millie! I too adore Mike Huckabee-hope your meeting went well. Such drama for one day and you always share your stories in such an engaging manner- love the Sunday School comment- I will have to remember that line!

Shop Keeper... Pamela said...

Oh... Brin, I couldn't imagine the gut-wrenching feeling you felt. Not knowing where Millie was. So glad God was looking over You & Millie.

Goodness, this Mike Huckabee seems to be the REAL thing here. I saved the site so I can go back... & catch up on what I have been missing. Want that book!!!

Many Blessings 2 You on this November Day, Pamela

Michelle said...

Brin,

I would have done the same thing you did! Sometimes you just gotta get mad at people and let it out!

CatHerder said...

I am SO happy you got Millie back, thats horrible...i would have been a basket case. ps...LOVE your blog, and you are quite a writer...you should write a daily column in the newspaper...

Miss G said...

Oh my goodness!!! Haven't laughed that hard in quite awhile... save the drama for Obama... hilarious! Thanks for sharing and glad to hear that Millie is back safe and sound!

Rosa said...

I'm with you on the stick thing! When Jada was about two she started drooling in the middle of the night. I thought is was strange but, whatever. She was still drooling when I got up. Had a puddle under her head when I got home from my first bus ride. Went to the vet, tried allergy medicine,x-ray, then put her under so they could look down her throat. The vet found tiny pieces of plant matter stuck in little pockets in her throat. Plant matter which came from the stick she liked to chase and wrestle with. Argh!
Haven't thrown a stick in two years. Until the other day. She was so puppyish and wanted to play so badly that I gave in. Pure joy, until the stick stabbed her in the mouth ! Some whimpering and bleeding.Argh!
She's fine but I'm sticking to my soft frisbee!
She also LOVED to visit everyone in the neighbourhood. You couldn't leave the gate open for even a second! We would go looking calling " Jada, cheese!" and before you knew it she'd come running. Scared the living daylights out of me every time!
Now that she's four it never happens. Whew!
Aren't young girls a riot?! :D

Rosa said...

I meant the sunday school girls, not the dogs. . . lol

Sue@CountryPleasures said...

Oh Brin, you REALLY need to write a book about your life! Poor Millie and YOU, so thankful she's home and safe! I love Mike too, I really wanted to vote for him for President! I love the phase, Save the drama of Obama! Fill us in on your meetting of Mike! Happy Thanksgiving too!

lady jane said...

So thankful Millie's all right!!!

Yes to Huckabee!

Save your drama for Obama. hehehe. love it.

This post gave a me a much needed chuckle. :o)

Linda Z said...

Hehe.

My husband kept saying he was just going to write in Huckabee even though he wasn't on the ticket.

sister sheri said...

You've got to copyright that... or maybe a bumper sticker...
"Save the Drama for Obama!"

Brin... this is too funny! And please do send encouragement to Huckabee...

Brenda@CoffeeTeaBooks said...

I am SO glad Millie is safe and that you live in a town where the police will go to find a kidnapped dog.

LOVE Mike Huckabee, too!

Tracey said...

Thank goodness you found her. I can't imagine the feelings that you felt. I truly believe God knows when our emotions get out of control , after all he was human too. Glad all turned out fine and your day ended on a high note.

Amy said...

Glad you got your dog back and I don't think I would've behaved any better in the same situation.

Kristie said...

I am so glad Millie is safe! I can imagine how panicked you must have felt.

I also adore Mike Huckabee!! He's one of the few good ones out there!

Elaine said...

We have an eight month old Golden Retreiver that we have fallen in love with. Sometimes my husband and I look at each other and wonder how this happened so quickly. I'm so glad you found Millie.

Crazy about Mike Huckabee too!

Susan said...

Considering the Mess and the astronomical deficit that the previous (8 year) administration has left your country with - there is no question, is there ?

that "all of" the drama has been left with Obama.

God Bless & Protect him and his beautiful family.

Terri said...

The Millie missing story was very upsetting! So grateful she is ok and back home.

Jenny said...

I'm with Vee. So happy Millie was found safe and sound. What a silly hound.

As for Huckabee, he seems like such a gem of a guy. A real, honest, down-to-earth politician. Is there such a thing? That seems like such an oxymoron.

Anywho, I suppose we're all saving the drama for a certain someone. My husband, tongue-in-cheek, says everything will be fine now, Obama will take care of everything.

LOL

Jenn said...

Dogs and children. They live in a world of their own. I often wish I could go there. The world of no cares and wondering. I don't seem to remember how to get there??? I am glad Millie is o.k. Have a great Thanksgiving Brin!

Amy said...

I'm hoping for a Palin/Huckabee ticket in the next election.

Glad Millie is okay. Were the police even worried about the guys being around your house?

UnderHisWing4Ever said...

I'm so happy you found Millie. I know that feeling of frantic fear when a fur-child is missing! So painful it hurts to breathe. Thanks to the good Lord that she was found unharmed.

Victoria said...

LOL at your day and you threatening everyone. So glad Millie was ok though!

I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to meet Huckabee! He was my choice in the primaries.

Mrs. Pauls said...

I loved your stories! I teach Sunday School for Grades 1 to 3. What a great time we have!