Wednesday, August 5, 2009

It's all starting to hit me, I think: the loss, the fact that I can't go "home" at the end of the day. Strangely, the thing I'm missing most - besides my privacy, of course... and my bed - is gardening. Sure, I still have my containers, thickly planted with herbs and peppers and such. But I miss digging in the dirt. I miss watching Millie play as I plant. I miss pulling weeds and watering.

Gayla has a new book coming out that I can't wait for: Growing Great Grub: Organic Food From Small Spaces. A treasure, for sure. As I seek to down, down, downsize, I'm becoming passionate about small and simple. As deeply as I feel the emptiness from the loss of Freeman House, I'm excited about the prospect of a small cottage and small projects, gardens and recipes that will come from that.

I only have to make it through the summer.

In other news, I got a job last week. It's nothing great, but these days, any job is a job to be thankful for, right? I start Monday.

Hope your day is full and happy. -Brin

32 comments:

Rebecca said...

Brin, it is a loss you have suffered, the loss of a place you loved and therein felt nurtured and content. Let yourself mourn that loss, but don't get lost in it. Go through the grief, then pull yourself up by your bootstraps and move on. Perhaps there is a huge lesson in this for you, one of living simply, frugally, one of focus solely on God and not on possesions,not saying that you have been focused on the wrong things, but just that somehow God is using this to refine and teach you something great. I like your persistent of attitude of looking ahead with positive expecatations. You'll be fine, better than fine, you'll be great. Just do the things you do best. Congrats on the new job! Can't wait to here about it. And, you're right...any job in todays market is valuable!

Rebecca said...

And, could I have butchered my spelling and grammar any worse than in the above post? :) Sheesh.

rachel said...

congratulations on the job, brin - i hope you find it engaging and stimulating enough to feel interested when you're there, even if it's not something you're passionate about...xx

MrsSouthernBelle said...

Congrats on the job and good luck with the future cottage! Cant wait to see the progress!

Sue@CountryPleasures said...

It sounds like the new year is looking bright already! COngrats on the job, can't wait to hear more about it and the cottage. I totally understand about digging in the dirt! You will have next season. Hugs!

Patsy said...

Brin,

Glad you have found a job and you are right that any job in this economy is a precious commodity. I know so many people who have lost their jobs and cannot find anything else.

I am asking God to send you a sign that everything will be okay. But you already know that but a little sign will be comforting too, I think. I have a feeling He will send you a colorful bird that will catch your eye and You will know it is from Him. Even the sparrows are precious to Him so You know that You are too.

God bless sweetie and give Millie some pats from me.

tara said...

God has not forgotten you. He has not failed to hear your voice. No matter what it feels like or looks like on paper or in your minds eye...the Lover of your soul has not turned His back. He is ever present. be ever present with Him. gets some rest for your soul. *hugs*

Michelle said...

Brin, congrats on a job...and yes, any job is good these days. You know, I live in a small condo (cute condo) but as small as the space is I have definitely made it my little "cottage" and it feels good. You will always make a place your home when you add your personal touches, no matter where you are. It's not to say I can't wait to have my first home. :) I can't wait for your new cottage. You have enough land to build a wonderful garden!! It's hard transitioning though...I understand but God is guiding you and you know it will be a good thing in the end. :)

xoxo

Michelle

thatmom said...

Brin, I wanted you to know that I am praying for you when I look at the lovely green creamer and sugar I purchased from your auction. The Lord is good and His mercies are new every day. I look forward to reading more in your journal of faith as He brings you to your next place!

Love,
Karen

AnNicole @ OurSuburbanCottage said...

It may sound strange to say "I'm sorry for your loss" when I'm referring to a house, but I really am sorry. I'm so glad to hear things are looking up though, with a new job and a new cottage in the works.

Isn't life wacky? Sometimes life is like a forest fire that blazes through, engulfing everything in its path. And yet new life springs up as a result.

I wish you the best!

RusticOkie said...

Congratulations on the new job. It's amazing sometimes how life changes course in such a drastic way. I'm sure this new life will be wonderful for you.

scot7 said...

BRIN,I KNOW YOU MISS FREEMAN HOUSE AND ALL THE PLANS YOU HAD FOR IT!! I MISS IT FOR YOU BUT YOUR COTTAGE AND FUTURE GARDEN WILL BE WONDERFUL ASLO JUST THINK OF THAT AND KEEP MOVING FORWARD!!I BOUGHT SOME OF YOUR THINGS ON EBAY AND WHEN I SEE THEM I THINK OF YOU AND SAY A PRAYER FOR YOUR FUTURE!GOD BLESS YOU ALWAYS MINA

Jenn said...

Congrats on the job! And before long you will be working on building your own little cottage and have a little land for a garden again.

Kathleen Grace said...

Congratulations on the job Brin. Even if it isn't what you really want to do it is a step in the right direction. Feeling a sense of loss is normal, I'm still praying for you, but your new dreams could turn out to be even better than the old ones.

Cathy said...

I am so happy you are starting a job. Yes, it is difficult out here. Hopefully we are all learning from these experiences. I learned my lesson of "smaller" living about 3 years ago. Changed a lot in my life. Keep up your positive attitude. You help all of us to keep one as well. Can't wait for things to roll along on the cottage. Are you living with your parents right now? Love Cathy

Sherry said...

All things work together for good...

I am so glad about your job! Good for you.

I'll keep an eye out on Freeman House for you and report the progress...

patientmom said...

There should always be room for grieving the loss of treasures in our life. You seemingly have lost a dream of what your future was going to look like, and that is reason enough to grieve for a moment...but good for you for seeing past today and into tomorrow to embrace the good things that await you...lessons learned in the darkness of life are the ones we hold most precious...and you are learning abundance through simplicity...

I am sitting on the edge of my seat to hear all about your new job...you are a blessing to us :) Your transparency, especially through the pain, is a lesson in real strength...

You my courageous Brin, are a living testimony of Grace through the fire :)

Blessings to you as you take these next steps in your amazing journey!

Elenka said...

good job, Brin! Hope you will like whatever you will be doing and that it will give you some peace.

So blessed! said...

Congrats on the new job! God is good.
Hugs from NE Texas.

Karen Deborah said...

you have been through a lot but you are no quitter. In between the sorrow for what is now past there is a bright spot of hope for the new future and your little cabin sounds just perfect!

Deb said...

Congratulations on the job, imperfect though it be.

Would you be able to plant something at your new place? I don't know how the growing season works in Texas, but fruit trees are 50% off up here in Colorado right now. If you could even spring for just one little sapling to plant, you could think about it while you're not there. And, take Millie with you, and take pictures to show us!

TBS said...

Congratulations on the job! I'm sure you will kick a** and bring your colleagues cookies every Friday :-)
//Tine, DK

Lynda said...

I've been away for 3 months & was thrilled when I returned to the land of blogging to discover that you had, too ! (Blogland just wasn't the same without you !) So ... welcome back :)

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your beloved Grandfather, and I am also sorry to hear that Freeman House is no longer yours. But these things happen for a reason, & I'm sure that in time, you will know why. You are such a strong person, & I just know that you will weather these storms, too ... and that everything will turn out for the best for you. And more !

Bye for now
Lynda, Kilimanjaro, East Africa

betty r said...

Love your attitude Brin..God is guiding your steps.
I will miss you blogging from Freeman House of course but new adventures lay ahead!
Keep trusting..

pk said...

Seeing all your doing with your new cottage and garden. Again so happy for you .

pk said...

Ok, all I had written did not take and post. Sorry. Wanted to say I'm happy for you and your acceptance in your journey with the Lord and looking forward to seeing your creativity with your cottage and garden etc. hugs and pats for Millie too.

Honey said...

Hi Brin! I hope your new job is going well. I can not wait to hear what you have to say about it! :) I love your plans for your new cottage home. I looked at the website you shared with us and it is darling! Millie and you will soon be digging in the dirt at your new home and I sure hope you take us along with you! Have a great night...

Victoria said...

I can imagine how much you are missing your garden and the joy it brought you.

On the bright side, congrats on the new job!

jill said...

Brin, how's the job going? Your land looks so peaceful, green...beautiful! I looked at the houseplans for your cottage - what a good choice - the picture on the website of the finished cottage was lovely. You are like a pioneer of long ago...start with what you can and build it up with your own hands. I imagine it will be even more fulfilling than anything you've done prior to this. I'm excited for you! You've been through alot...yet you're still standing. When you feel alone remember...you're never alone and many of us are praying for you, lifting you up in our hearts and stand beside you even if we never meet in this life. Keep on keeping on and keep us close by keeping us informed! You are loved!

Prairie Girl Studio said...

hi brin ~
just found my way to you via layla at 'the lettered cottage' and i am most grateful to 'meet you'!
i was taken right away by the fact you are a kindred spirit who likes to dig in the dirt ...
i am sorry you have had to leave something dear behind, but just think that by this time next year you will have painted many new and brilliantly beautiful strokes on your new canvas ...
sometimes when i am nervous or anxious, i try and switch that energy into excitement ... i pray that that day will come soon for you!
blessings,
prairiegirl

tara said...

offering up prayers for you - my friend that I've never met but find myself concerned for. I hope you are getting some much need r & r.

Hugs,
Tara

Myra - twigs and honey said...

Hi Brin!

Good luck with everything! The new land and cottage plan sound lovely!

I just wanted to drop a note and say that I didn't forget a sweet comment your wrote on an old post on my blog:
http://twigsandhoney.blogspot.com/search?q=istanbul
My hubby and I are finally going to Istanbul! We bought tickets yesterday. :)