Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Blooming

As long as we are persistent...
we will continue to grow.
We cannot choose the day or time
when we will fully bloom.
It happens in its own time.
-Denis Waitley


This winter, I made a flower of wool and felt and yarn and an old button. Some days - when I awoke feeling blue, when a day seemed impossible to face - I pinned it on. It would remind me, throughout the day, that as long as I was persistent... even in my sadness... I would continue to grow.

It happens in its own time, blooming does. You can't choose when you'll unfurl yourself from struggles or grief or loss or regret. One day you just do. One day you just find that all that time shut away, in the dark, has made you different... new... beautiful, even. And then there you are: bloomed.

My life has changed dramatically from a year ago. Today my bloomed self is facing astonishing life decisions. I have been handed an opportunity to move to Jerusalem to live and work. Jerusalem. In the Old City. If I choose Option One, I will be walking in Jesus' footsteps within 10 weeks. Option Two? Option Two is love. And of course, Option Three: stay where I am, in a job I enjoy, regroup from the last three years, and write.

I'd like to have it all. Options One through Three. Who says a (bloomed) girl can't have it all?

But for now I watch. I pray. And I pin on my bloom and wait for things to happen. All good things happen in their own time....

I hope you will go out and let stories happen to you,
and that you will work them, water them
with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom,
till you yourself burst into bloom.
-Clarissa Pinkola Estes

32 comments:

Raining Pearls said...

Praying He will guide you to the right choice for this season in your life.

Life At Camellia Cottage said...

You are such an inspiration to me. I feel I am in that dark place, fighting to find the light of day. I know it will come, I just have to be patient.

As for your decisions, of course prayer is the first and foremost thing, and so is patiently listenin for an answer. But, when given those three options, I would choose love, because if it is real, honest to goodness, wanting what is best for me love, all the other things will come. I was 32 when I met my beloved, and we will soon celebrate our 25th anniversary. He has made my life so much fuller and more precious. Does that mean you have to 'have' someone? Of course not, but when that someone comes along, and you know it, it will all make sense.

Kathleen Grace said...

Ahhh Brin, I have hoped and prayed that things would work out for you. You were dealt some blows last year, but look at you now! More options than you know what to do with:>) God has a plan for you and it looks like the clouds are parting. I am so glad for you.

Lynda said...

Option two, Option two ! Because, with LOVE .... you can conquer ANYTHING !
((Hugs)) to you ... and may all your dreams and hopes come true ... you, of all people, deserve it !
Lynda, Kilimanjaro, East Africa

Sue said...

Thinking of you and remembering you in my prayers.

Sue@CountryPleasures said...

If anyone can have it all, it's you Brin, but since you've bloom, follow your heart, love is a many splended thing! You will choose wisely, you always do. Can't wait to hear more about the big love! :)

Jenn said...

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you
in time - It's easy.

Daughter of the King said...

Praying that God will give you wisdom! As a college student in my mid-twenties I have enjoyed watching you walk through good and bad times. Thanks for being real and for continuing to walk with God. You are an example to me and I pray that God will bless you with adventurous roads ahead. I look forward to reading about what is to come for you!

Sara said...

I LOVE that so far all of the actual votes that have been given have been for door #2!! That's my vote too. And something for you to mull around: When God wanted to make an analogy between the relationship of Christ and the church, He used the relationship of a bride a groom. And when Jesus said "I go to prepare a place for you," he was using a phrase men used directly after a girl accepted his proposal of marriage. It's no accident. I know it's no guarantee that a marriage is where you would head, but if you have the possibility for it, I think you should risk it!

Kimberly said...

Love. Enough said;)

Rebecca said...

Brin, I am so lovin' watching all the exciting changes that God is working in your life. What an incredible testimony of awesome twists and turns from an always surprising God. Watch and pray, you're right of course.

Jamie said...

Choose love......

Lochlanina said...

#1 very cool choice
#2 let love choose you
#3 regrouping and writing can happen anywhere -- they happen best when you are where God wants you to be

and that's my not-terribly-helpful two cents :D

Lochlanina said...

#1 very cool choice
#2 let love choose you
#3 regrouping and writing can happen anywhere -- they happen best when you are where God wants you to be

and that's my not-terribly-helpful two cents :D

the lady of the house said...

Amen! What an amazing God. Love your bloom! Simply Delightful. Praying that you will be where he wants you to be.

Pearls To Hide My Neck said...

I'm so excited for you. You deserve options and that is what you have. Whatever you decide will be the right thing for you. More details on each would be greatly enjoyed. (Vicarious living, you know)

cupcake studio said...

Wow, such amazing opportunities! Praying that the right blessing will be revealed to you soon.

Ashley said...

I think deep down we all know (or at least have somewhat of a "gut feeling") what the desired option is. You have 3 great opportunities to choose from, just choose the one that is the best fit and it what your heart desires. I, too, have a few great opportunities and am at a crossroads with what to do. I think I know the answer, but that doesn't mean the decision is any easier... on anyone. Good luck!

rebeccaquarles said...

Wow, so many options! Praying that you will make the best choice for you at this moment in your life.

Linda Z said...

Wow! Lots of options! I can't wait to see how God will lead you! :)

willis.tracy said...

Girl- I don't know you, but I do read your blog from time to time. Honey- LOVE! No need to think it over. Jesus's footprints are always beside you. You don't need to go to Jeruselum (which could potentially be dangerous) to walk with Jesus! And, you can write no matter where you are. LOVE is the only thing that isn't abundant everywhere you'll go. It's the sad truth, but if LOVE has touched you, you'll always feel incomplete if you turn from it. So, LOVE is your answer!

betty r said...

All 3 options sound tempting I bet..watch and pray is my answer too!

myletterstoemily said...

that gorgeous blue button would
cheer me right up!

i agree with your loving fan club...choose
love!

A family of boys said...

Can we help you vote on which option? I'd be with the rest of the masses of your readers and choose the love side. Then again, we don't have all the details, but love is well, love.

Bluebird49 said...

Isn't that like all of us--we want to have all doors....1-3! I hope you will choose the one God has given you to bloom in.

Tammy said...

You're a woman who loves to travel; to me, there is no other choice. You can write anywhere.

And TRUE love will wait while you're in Jerusalem (or come with you, or visit often!)...

Shira said...

I am with Tammy. I vote Jerusalem!

Susan said...

Of course I'm wonderin' like you are why you couldn't have some "combo" version of all three. Rock On !

pk said...

Brin, my dearest sister in the Lord went home to be with , Him last year. I had asked her how it was she always knew what to choose,do, go , accept etc. Her reply was , if there is no doubt , I do it but if there is any I don't or , I wait. I thought how beautiful and simple was this. Her advice has given me peace many times since in my life and I pray it will be a help to you. hugs

Lindsey said...

I completely agree...blogging can help lead from darkness into light...

Lindsey Petersen

Vee said...

Three very exciting choices...if I were choosing, I'd always choose love. On that note, praying God's very best for you and that He will lead you where you should be.

redeemed diva said...

You do have a messy, thrilling life. And it's that way all at once! As always, praying for you and hoping that whatever course you take I (and all your readers) are invited for the ride.