The deed to relinquish ownership of Freeman House is drawn up. I just can't bring myself - yet - to sign it. How did it come to this? How can I bravely venture into new adventures knowing my beloved home won't be there to return to?For now, I'm keeping my head down. I'm sitting at my Grandfather's bedside or home, knitting. As a result, you'll find the Freeman House HouseHelper Sets on sale this week - $5 off! If you've been wanting a piece of Freeman House, now's the time and here's your excuse. I truly hope these find happy homes....
You know how, when you get emotional, your throat feels thick and your eyes pound, heavy with tears? Guess that's how I feel right now. Good thing I know good things are coming, else I'd be despairing under a thick and heavy load...
33 comments:
I'm so sad over you losing your home. Blessings to you and your family. Your Grandfather is still hanging in there and I know you are too. I'll definitely will check out what you have for sale. I wish I could help more.
Bless your sweet heart. We all love you and know God can't wait to give you your next assignment.
Standing with you and shedding a few tears too.
You are a dear girl.
Lucy
Brin,
So sorry you are losing Freeman house. I have laughed with you and cried with you and I just know God has amazing things in store for you. Keep your chin up...Prayers for you and your grandfather as well.
Blessings~
Thinking of you during this time ~ long distance hugs to you....
I am there with you. My mom is dieing and I am taking care of her. The home has been in foreclosure twice and now it is for sale. We built this house. I feel my life is going out of control and I can't do anything to stop it. My dad has passed away and with no brothers or sisters i am an orphan. All I can say Brin is..I am there with you...in thoughts and prayers and if you need an ear..I am here.
Geneen from tehachapi
www.27641stallionsprings.com
Sending my prayers your way.
I must tell you what we went through these past years.
Due to my husband's illness, we had to sell our dream home (which was nice but not hugely expensive). It was heartbreaking at the time.
We moved to follow a job offer he had in another state and lived in two rental places after that.
After we moved back home, God opened a way for us to purchase the house we are in now which is smaller but I love it so much. I'm in the country again for the first time since childhood.
As I look back, I know what was absolutely heartbreaking at the time was in His plan and His presence was there through the tears.
Truly... tears may endure for the night but JOY comes in the morning.
((HUG))
Lifting you up.
I'm sorry Brin. Is there any way to work it out? So your grandfather is still here, I have been praying for you and thinking about you. Are you selling any of those little knitted toys? I would love to buy some.
I keep wishing this would turn out differently.
sometimes things are just not understandable and then we have to fall back in those ever lasting arms and just trust.
My heart is heavy for you too. Sorry to hear you must let go of Freeman House. You put so much of yourself into making it a home.
Fear not though, God has a purpose for you, dear girl. He will let you know what it is soon. I feel it.
May your heart find peace in His mercy. xxoo
My thoughts are with you...keep the faith. Your talent will see you on to a new adventure!
Oh Brin, I am PRAYING for you. For peace, comfort, and endurance over this mountain. You are not alone.
Been there and my heart aches for you. Give your Grandpa lots of kisses and love the house and pray for it's new owners. No I am not trying to be cruel. Just letting you know how I got through it with Gods leaning on my heart.
What I've learned (well, what I'm trying to learn): Just keep on keeping on.
Sorry about it all. C.
I am just catching up on your blog from the past several weeks and am truly sorry to hear about your Grandfather, the bakery and Freeman House. I am at a loss for words and can only imagine what you must be feeling. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Whatever the outcome, I know you'll come out of this a stronger person. Is there any way that the bank would be willing to work with you rather than your having to go through this?
Ellen
I know it is very hard for you to see Freeman House go. Your grandfather is still around? I must have misunderstood. Give him hugs and kisses while you can. Praying that the sale goes well and that God does have something more in mind for you than unemployment. It's hard to grow up which is why I always reminded my son he didn't want to be an adult until his time. He is 19 now. Love and hugs, Patty
I am so sorry about Freeman House. I was living vicariously through you, as I also have a love for old houses. My hope would be that our Lord and Savior, who knows you better than you know yourself, has something different, yet, somehow better. Life is definately an adventure to be lived. Keep your eyes upon Him. He holds you in His hands.
Dear Brin,
Just read your blog from front to back, and I'm pretty sure you are a kindred spirit. I just wanted to share some fun stuff:
I also did lots of soul searching in my twenties...Happy 30th to us! I turned 30 on May 12th :) I love birthdays in general, but this one was exceptional cuz I feel like I am moving away from a decade of angst, heartache, searching, and feeling very, very lost and moving toward a brand spankin' new JOURNEY. I have no regrets, and I use every challenge as a lesson learned, but still...it seems like things are finally starting to click into place! I had a "Prom Party" for my b-day this year and encouraged all my friends to wear old bridesmaid dresses that were collecting dust in their closets-- it was quite the celebration!!
In 2004 and 2005 I worked at a holistic educational retreat center in Rhinebeck, NY called The Omega Institute (my heaven on earth), and I met my life coach there, Win Harper (www.winharper.com). We have become good friends, and I have absolutely loved a New Year exercise that he gave me, which I've filled out the past few years. I love to share it with others who love to grow and learn about themselves and make their dreams come true (and I also thought it might be helpful since you are at a crossroads), so here it is for you:
I found this exercise in a book "The Art of Possibility" by Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander. I recommend the book to you.
I want you to think about 2008 and what you want to do and achieve. Now, I want you to give yourself an A for the whole year. The A is based upon your effort and your accomplishments. Now I ask that you write me a letter telling me why you deserved an A. I want you to go to this time next year, and look back, and write about all the insights you acquired, milestones you attained during the year as if these accomplishments were already in the past. Everything must be written in the past tense. Phrases such as, "I hope," "I intend," or "I will" must not appear. If you wish you may mention specific goals you reached, but I am more interested in the person you will have become by next December. I am interested in the attitude, feelings, and worldview of the person who will have done all she wished to do or become everything she wanted to be. And I want you to fall passionately in love with the person you are describing in the letter.
You made a reference to a project writing a daily devotional while you were in Colorado, and I was curious if you're still working on that project. I receive a daily e-mail from Neale Donald Walsch (who wrote Conversations With God---don't know if you're familiar) that you can sign up for here: http://www.nealedonaldwalsch.com/index.php?p=Signup. It usually is spot-on for guidance I need for the upcoming day.
I'm proud of you for following your bliss...cooking and baking and giving, giving, giving. Keeping spreading the magic!
Love and hugs,
Grace
PS Here are some tidbits of wisdom from my life coach that have helped me tremendously over the past few years:
The first question is always: What do you want? Ask for what you want and say "no" to things you don't.
Second: How are you taking care of yourself?
Third: What are you learning about yourself?
I want you to listen to and trust yourself. Everyone has advice, and it is based on their world views, and their world experiences.
I am happy to hear that you asked for help. Whenever we step into a new adventure, we need to surround ourselves with supportive, positive individuals. Anyone who you know is going to rain on your parade, need not be consulted.
You sound good, and happy. What do you need now? What are you grateful for, and what is going great in your life right now?
When you honor your values your life is fulfilled. That doesn't mean that there are not ups and downs.
Believe and trust in yourself. You are gifted and want to serve. Your life is abundant because you have made choices that are life enhancing for you.
Sweet Brin, you are amazing! I feel your pain and your promise, stay on the path, you are not alone! Love ya!!
I'm not sure how, but you have a way of making others feel at home.... like we are old friends. And I hurt for you and the season of loss you are going through. Thank you for sharing with us. I will keep you in my prayers!
I wish I had words of wisdom and comfort that could take all of this away. Please just know that you are on my mind, in my heart and my prayers too!
I hardly know what to say ... I've been battling the decision to give up my own much loved old fixer upper. I can't afford to keep her but I also can't imagine leaving her and living my life without her ... it's terrible. Stop by and say hello, she's a beauty
http://29blackstreet.blogspot.com/
Praying for you, so sorry for the losses you are facing right now. You are in the desert before the Promise.
I wish I had lots of $$ and I would have loved to buy Freeman House and then sell it back when and if you wanted it. Putting so much heart into a place and then having to move on MUST be painful. Change is so hard but I hope and pray your change is so good that this will quickly fade. Prayers with you.
Good things are coming, yes, as Christians we know this, but there are times when we are asked to do terribly difficult things. I've been talking about this a lot of late having read one of Elisabeth Elliot's recent devotionals. She talks about not understanding why God doesn't allow things even when it seems as if it would be a very good thing. She says that in those times that we can offer even the "no" or the disappointment to God as a sacrifice. I'm sorry that Freeman House seems to be your sacrifice, but I continue to believe that there is something waiting in the wings much better. Much love to you, Brin.
I have lost a dream home through my divorce. After 5 years, it still pains me. However, when I focus on where I am now, I'm very blessed in many ways. Even moreso than where I was before.
Do I love every nook and cranny of this place? No. Can I change every nook and cranny in order to fall in love with it? Realistically no, but I'm making the best of it and it's getting close! There is so much one can change.
Life is such a state of mind. Learning to roll with the punches and looking for the good in every step along the way is the best chance of survival. And happiness.
I loved how you wrote about your house. I wanted to be in that house, that's how you made me feel. I long for creaky floors and chipped paint on old doors and a slamming screen door. But you CAN have it again.
Set your goal, and move forward, one day at a time.
I'm dreaming of a future little cottage in my hometown, on abit of property with my workshop outback. And that dream will be with me until I land it one day. :)
Donna
Hi, Brin ~ ~ I got the tote, and it's adorable. I can think of 100 things to pop into it. I think it may be getting a workout going back and forth to the pool. The fabrics are gorgeous!!
Hey Brin,
I don't know if you read your comments or not but I to let you know that my heart is just breaking for you. I was directed to your blog by a friend last week and I have read it all - yes, I was just charmed by your writing and enjoyed so much hearing about Freeman house and everything that you were doing.
I was so thrilled about the bakery and then so upset to hear about your grandfather. I am so terribly sorry about the house - I share the same dreams of living in an old house and making it my own.
You have such a way with words - a gift. Reading your blog made me think of you as a kindred spirit, as if I had known you forever. Please don't stop writing, I shared your blog with my bible study group and we all agree that you should write a daily devotional, you would do a wonderful job with it.
Heading over to see if I can grab some of your things for sale!
Have you ever thought of listing Freeman House on eBay?
Rest in the confidence that doors to the Freeman House may be closing...and that is very sad indeed...BUT doors in the Heavenlies are going to be thown open wide only to find Brin bounding through them with wild abandon!..You are loved :)...hang in there :)...Bev
May God bless you and your family. Thank you so much for sharing with us about your grandfather. I just love his photo in uniform and the things you told us about him.
All my grandparents had died before I was born, so I only know them through stories and old photos. I always missed not having grandparents. I
am drawn to older people and try to appreciate them. Now I try to be the kind of grandmother to my 2 precious grandsons that I would have wanted for myself.
You have been richly blessed.
I'm praying for you Brin
many hugs
Antonella
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